It's the only way I can describe how I feel right now. Beta went down to 16.8 on Friday. Dr. M and I briefly discussed what this means. Basically, the answer is we don't know--could be my eggs, could be uterine issues. Egg donor and Surrogate are basically my options, though he couldn't say which is the right one to pursue, because we just don't know. He does want to have a sit down with B and me (which is nice, normally it is by phone) to discuss what we should do next. He said he'll go over my chart and see if there are any missing immune issues that an immunologist may be able to address.
The worst part of this is B being gone having fun with his friends while I am at home completely miserable. He's been gone since Wednesday. He comes home tomorrow morning. We have discussed him coming home this evening and he finally told me this afternoon that he wanted to stay, he doesn't see his friends that often, and wants to stay and have fun. I get it, I just wish his choice was me and not his friends. I just feel so lost and abandoned right now.
And, to top it all off, the dog threw up three times last night (all on the carpet, which we have very little of, but he seeks out when vomiting) and the cat pooped on the dog's bed. The universe seems to be giving me the finger right now.
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